Photo Challenge: Days 1 & 2

EmHart is running a Photo Challenge this month and although I have NO ARTISTIC ABILITY when it comes to photography, I thought it would be a fun way to pass the time. 

Day 1: Beginning (of school...yikes!!)

Day 2: Fire (Yes, I am already decorated for Fall, and yes I know it's disgusting!)

Last night I was online and found this great article.  Fertility Treatment.  While my mom and I were out to lunch she was saying how there should be some type of bracelet out there for awareness about infertility similar to the yellow LIVESTRONG ones and the pink ones that represent breast cancer.  I don't think that there is anything like that out there but I hope maybe someday soon there might be, I would proudly wear one and I am pretty sure my mom would too!  Because this is not something that you go through and then forget about.  Although memories of these difficult times will fade, they will never ever be forgotten.  And I will continue to be very open about our struggles to get pregnant.

Friday was such an exciting day for P and me that it made me realize how absolutely horrible these last 20 months have been.  We have both been walking around with a weight on our shoulders heavy enough to make it difficult to get through some days.  I had become a shell of the person I used to be.  Friday night in the car my parents told me that they felt like "the old me" was back. 

People often throw around IVF (or fertility treatments) like they are no big deal.  Like it is some quick fix.  It is often those same people that have NEVER been through it.  It's not a quick procedure that guarantees you a baby.  I have had the unfortunate chance to follow so many wonderful bloggers that have walked away from fertility treatments because they are just so damn hard and eventually you get to the point where you just don't know how much longer you can put your mind and body through the abuse.  Fertility treatments consume you, every part of you.  For these past 8 weeks I have been consumed by injections, medications, fears, worries, anger, procedures, and everything else that I can't put into words right now.  And for the first time we are feeling the joy of being pregnant and we are trying so hard to enjoy it.  Of course I am worried about the ultrasound and everything that could or could not go wrong over these next few weeks but I am trying to choose hope.  I am trying not to surrender to the nightmare that has been these last two years.  I am choosing to believe this will work.  Because for far too long I believed it never would.