Transfer is Set

I cried this morning.  Really really cried.  I pictured myself taking a pregnancy test and it being positive and I started sobbing.  We have waited so long for this and we are so close; the yearning I have deep down inside of me almost hurts.  Then I told myself I needed to stop and stay as even tempered as I could because there is just as much of a chance that this won't work. 


I started taking my progesterone suppositories yesterday morning.  I don't get many side effects from them, they're just gross.  If I am pregnant I will continue those for the first 12 weeks.  I am continuing to take my bromcriptine.  If I am pregnant in two weeks, I will have to discontinue that.  And I am still taking my prenatals, as I have been for the last two years!  It is still pretty uncomfortable in there.  It hurts even more when I have a full bladder, I am going to guess some body parts are touching that don't normally which is causing the discomfort.  From everything I have read, my normally walnut sized ovaries have swelled up to the size of grapefruits.  If I were to get my period in two weeks they would probably return back to normal around that time.  If I were to get pregnant, they could stay that big for the first 12 weeks...eeeek!


Any type of severe OHSS seems to have stayed away.  I weighed myself this morning and I was actually down a few pounds, still peeng frequently and no nausea or trouble breathing.  I totally attribute this to my doctor catching my estradiol so quickly and monitoring me so very closely. 


I called the embryologist at 2pm today and recieved some really good news!  Of the 6 eggs fertilized through regular IVF all 6 have divided and we have some 2-cell and some 4-cell.  Of the 4 fertilized through ICSI all 4 have divided and again we have some 2-cell and some 4-cell.  I also found out that two more eggs fertilized overnight (1 through regular IVF and 1 through ICSI) so we are up to 12 embryos!!  We will not know how many will meet the criteria for freezing until Day 5 which is Sunday.


So, the transfer is set.

Tomorrow morning we will be transferring one of our own little embryos.  We are to arrive there at 8:45, ready to transfer at 9:15.  I will be going to accupuncture before and after and then it will be out of our hands.

After 20 of the most difficult months of our life, we finally have a real chance at a baby.  It has put a definite strain on our marriage as well as our relationships with other people.  So, right now we are feeling happy, excited, nervous, scared...you name it

I know this doesn't work for everyone, we have as good a chance as anyone, and our success rate is still only 45-50%.  The thought of going through all this and not ending up pregnant at the end of it makes me sick to my stomach, so I am going to try not to think about it.

During my Egg Retrieval they did a mock transfer, and similar to my IUI, they had a lot of trouble with it, so they stitched my cervix up while I was under the anesthesia (with dissolvable stitches) to hopefully make the transfer a smoother one tomorrow.


No matter what we find out in two weeks, P and I are going to go away.  This whole summer has been a whirlwind and I can't even think about going back to work in a few weeks.  Let's just hope our time away will be spent celebrating and not drowning our sorrows.


Tomorrow as we walk into the room we will both be filled with...tiny bits of hope.


Oh god, please let this work...