My Funny First Graders

Thought now would be a great time to share a few more things my kids have said over the past few weeks, they are usually good for a laugh, sometimes a smile.

At the end of last week I said to the kids..."And it's finally Friday."  My student K responded with, "We made it through another week Mrs. C"  Haha, I couldn't have said it better myself.

Yesterday one of my students came up to me and asked me if I had any kids, when I said no, she said, "Well, you should, because you're really good with them."

Every week I pick a Star of the Week (it is really cheesy, they get an all about me poster hung up for the week and get to be the line leader, but it makes them happy.)  This week J got picked, and he brought his poster in Monday morning.  He told me I might not want to read it out loud because I might be embarassed (yes he is only 7)  One of the topics on the poster is "Things I Like About Myself."  After he wrote about how he was a good reader, had lots of friends, etc...he wrote "I am lucky I have a beautiful teacher."  If they could only stay small and sweet forever...

We are starting to talk about getting ready for second grade and for one of our centers we were working on a class book and they had to give a few pieces of advice to incoming kindergarteners about what to expect as they get ready for first grade.  I was reading through them last night, and one caught my eye.  If I could tell the kindergarteners any advice to get ready for first grade it would be..."Always be nice and respectful.  Don't ever tell someone they can't play with you, even if they're not your friend, you will hurt their feelings."  It made me smile.

Then today, little M came up to me and whispered in my ear, "Last night my puppy ate a sock, and this morning he puked it up." Haha, sometimes I swear they tell me stories just so they can see me burst out in laughter.

Lately I have been wondering if there is a reason I am a first grade teacher.  Right now it is not only a job, but it is filling a pretty big void in my life.  A few days ago I told P the only time I was happy was when I was at school with my kids, I am in a better place now so that statement is not 100% true, but it is definitely an escape for me.  I try not to think too much about it, but what if I am in this position because someone, somewhere knew a child would not find us quickly, and this was supposed to be a temporary "fix."  Oh god, I hope not.   

As far as IF goes, not really sure how I am feeling right now.  I am currently on cd 7.  The only way I know that is from this stupid program I downloaded on my phone last January, that my friend recommended called "My Days."  She told me she swore by it because it could figure out exactly when she ovulated and then got pregnant after only 3 months, she now has a 1 year old!!  If she only knew how well it doesn't work for someone like me.  The good thing is, it allows me to keep track of my cycle days, but other than that it is absolutely useless.  I haven't been obsessively temping (not really necessary at this point in my cycle but I am sure I will once I get close to ovulating) and aside from turning my monitor on this morning to determine it wasn't time to start POAS yet, I really have been kind of blah about the whole thing.  In some ways it has felt like a weight has been lifed off my shoulders, but in other ways it makes me sad because I feel like a little tiny part of me has given up. 

I guess I am happy we are waiting (although I am sure if we were going forward with IVF right now, I would probably say the same thing, glad we are moving forward.)  I didn't realize how horrible my relationship with P had been for those few days when I was really struggling (or maybe I did and I just didn't care.)  We were both walking around so angry, at life, at each other, and for me it was everyone around me that was able to get pregnant so easily.   Things are getting better.  We have laughed a lot these past few days, and IF talk hasn't totally consumed us (well mainly me.)  I am trying to let all of this pent up anger/frustration go, but it is hard, really, really hard for me.  Physically, I didn't realize how much weight I had lost over the past few weeks, but not to worry, I have eaten and drank enough over these past few days that I am pretty sure it is all back haha!

I hope to spend these next 6-7 weeks preparing myself mentally, physically, and emotionally.  I was so down in the dumps these past few weeks with everything that happened with our IUI that I am looking forward to building myself back up.  I have looked into both fertility massage and acupuncture.  My doctor recommended either/or, but said that really, it is just imporant that you find something that helps you relax, so I guess a lot of walks with Sage will be in order!  If anyone else has any ideas or thoughts, please throw em my way!