cd 8 part 2

Of course I spoke too soon, too effing soon. Just 5 minutes before I walked into the baby shower today, the nurse called, change of plan. My estradiol levels were sky high which doesn't match up with my follicle count, with my numbers I should have seen lots of BIG ones today. Here I was thinking 3 follicles measuring above 10mm was a good thing, but it's not. I have about a dozen follicles measuring under 10mm, they should be much bigger with how high my estradiol levels are, but they are not.

High estradiol can cause a cancelled cycle, it may also explain why I have thought over the past few months my body prepares to ovulate and something happens. Hopefully this ends up being nothing, but for now its something.   I can't believe this cycle might actually get cancelled...

I am so frustrated and upset. I didn't even ask the nurse the right questions. So for now I have to lower my dose to 37.5 IUs and of course go in for another u/s and more bloodwork tomorrow morning. Why is this so easy for some and so difficult for others?

The shower sucked. I put on my best face and pretended to be happy but I was filled with sadness and anger. Then one of my friends looked over at me and said, "I think you're brave for being here," and I just about fell apart. Just a few hours ago I felt great and now once again I feel ready to fall apart...