Don't Ignore Infertility

Because it is National Infertility Awareness Week, we were asked to particpate in posting about the following prompt...Don't ignore (fill in the blank)


This is my attempt at responding to Resolve's challenge to bloggers. 

Don't Ignore the fight you have inside you.  Each one of us is far more courageous and brave than we could have ever imagined.  Every day is a challenge, some days emotionally, some days physically, soem days mentally, and somedays it's all three!  Yet, we all continue to fight, something tells us we must keep fighting.  How we can go from breaking down to taking on another battle all in just a few days, hours, sometimes minutes is a pretty amazing thing.


It is that fight inside of us that gets us out of bed early in the morning to drive to appts. 

It is that fight inside of us that decides to move forward with another cycle when we know it's time for a break.

It is that fight inside of us that allows us to smile on the outside when on the inside all we want to do is scream.

It is that fight inside of us that gives us that tiny bit of hope that even though things are bad now, they won't (CAN'T) be this way forever.

When I heard the news yesterday that we were most likely going straight to IVF the fears and doubts hit me like a ton of bricks and I walked around in a bit of a daze for a little while.  What if I can't handle all the shots?  What if they don't monitor me well enough?  What if I get my hopes up too much?  What if this fails too? 


Then I got in the car with Sage, turned on the radio  and thought about all I have already been through and those four little words came out of my mouth...I can do this.  YOU can do this.  WE can do this.  The song playing on the radio was Jason Mraz's "I Won't Give Up." 

To those who have never experienced IF, there is no way to put it into words.  For as difficult as it feels for you to reach out to us, it is nothing compared to the daily struggle we face.  It sometimes seems like the world is just passing you by and you are at a standstill unable to participate, watching like an outsider.  You watch people celebrate good things in their lives and as much as you try and be a part of it, a part of you is shut off to their happiness, a part of you has grown a little cold.  Even your happiest of days aren't the "happy" they used to be.  But you don't give up, that fight inside of you pushes back.  That little fight inside of you tells you that eventually those days will become happy days again, hopefully filled with tubbies, bedtime stories, and lots hugs and kisses. For most of us, giving up is not an option.  A baby will come into our lives one way or another.

So, next time you feel like you just can't stand the thought of another failure, don't ignore that little bit of fight left inside of you, instead, allow it to take over.  Sometimes it is right under the surface, and sometimes you have to dig a little deeper to find it, but it is there, and we all have it.  And I pray for each and every one of us that the little bit of fight we have left, however small it may feel at times, wins out in the end...


To our little baby out there somewhere, don't worry, we still have a lot of fight left in us!

I Won't Give Up
Jason Mraz

When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use the tools and gifts
We got yeah we got a lot at stake
And in the end,
You're still my friend at least we didn't tend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn, how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I got, and what I'm not
And who I am

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up
I'm still looking up

I won't give up on us
God knows I'm tough, he knows
We got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up...