Saturday, July 21, 2012

Effort

What I am realizing while being on Lupron, is everything takes a little more effort. I felt like crap on Tuesday and when I woke up Wednesday I gave myself permission to just read when I got home from work. So, I started and finished a book in that same day. On Thursday I made plans with my mom after work and forced myself to crawl out of this hole that it is so easy to dig yourself into while going through this. We went for lunch and shopped. I had one of the best days I'd had in a while, and I paid for it later, I passed out in my clothes at 830. Aside from this nagging headache, the exhaustion really catches up with me every night. When my mom told me she couldn't imagine how I was feeling while on these meds, I told her to think back on menopause and she would know exactly how I was feeling! Then she said something that was so true...she remembers while going through it, everything was an effort. And that's how I feel. Whether its a good day or bad, everything is an effort. I have my baselines (u/s and bloodwork) on Thursday.


I still haven't gotten my period or had any bleeding and have now been on the Lupron for 9 days, I would have expected it to happen by now, but I will just have to wait and see. The shots continue to be easy. But there is always 3 seconds of hesitation before each one where I am in disbelief I am about to stick the needle in my stomach, and then I do it because I have to. Why can't we just make a baby the way so many others can???

12 comments:

  1. I know the frustration of "not being able to be like everyone else" when it comes to having a baby. I often get angry and jealous about it. We do all this because we have to, and pray that it will all be worth it in the end. I am thinking of you and praying for this cycle to be it.

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  2. Hi I am a new follower and found you through Sometimes blog. I found Lupron to be the worst out of all the drugs during our ivf. You will feel better once your start your stims process. Sorry that you are feeling so down and out.

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  3. I have that same moment of disbelief before each of mu shots still.

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  4. Sorry, I haven't been around as much lately, but I have been keeping up on your journey. I hope all of this is worth it for you! Don't stress about what you do or do not do each day...just do what you can. Good luck!

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  5. I always did the same thing with the Lupron shots. It's a bit surreal to think about. I also remember being completely drained while on Lupron. Drained but moody. Hang in there.

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  6. I know Lupron can have this effect and I'm SORRY your period hasn't come yet. What did your clinic say, just to keep waiting for it to show? UGH, so annoying. Hoping it comes super soon so you can start stimming, which should help with the symptoms (though I felt much more tired on Gonal-f but I was also emotionally exhausted at that point). Thinking of you!!! Thanks for all the <3 and support this past week. :)

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  7. Giving yourself shots puts so much extra pressure. You are so emotionally invested in this that sticking yourself can be so overwhelming. Maybe take a day off and ask your Hubby to do it for you? That was one of the best decisions I ever made. You can disconnect, even for a minute.

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  8. Oh lawdy... I did not have to do the Lupron shots which sucks because now I'm thinking I missed out on some good times.

    We can't make babies like others do because whoever is in charge of our uteruses ( What is the plural... Look at the amazing flock of.. Uteruses. Uteri. Uterus.) has fallen asleep at the wheel, apparently.

    I couldn't give myself the shots... Good on you. Let Bubba the hubbo do all of mine. He's been waiting to stab me for years.

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  9. Hope it gets easier... and thinking of you for your upcoming scan. I share your wish to be able to make babies the easy way... why oh why is it so hard ?!? Love, thoughts and wishes to you xoxo

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  10. I hesitated before every one of my shots, but that's not the important thing...the important thing is that you're doing them! Don't forget to give yourself credit, when credit is due :)

    Yes, Lupron sucks. I hate it. But you'll get through this part, and things get more exciting when you start the stims. Of course that means more shots too, but the time passes more quickly when your driving to a million appointments.

    Were you on BCPs first? Your period should have started a few days after those ended. You can always call your nurse and ask what she thinks.

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  11. Ugh, sounds horrible. Thinking of you!

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