After my egg retrieval I heard the news that a close family friend had passed away. He was like a brother to my dad, he went to both mine and my brother's wedding and was set to attend my cousins wedding this Friday night. Instead we will be attending his wake and funeral on Sunday and Monday. It hit me hard. Here we were trying so desperately to create life on a day when someone so important to my family had his taken away so suddenly. Life is so unfair.
This morning I felt a little better, still took it easy, but began to eat a little more. I still don't show any real symptoms of OHSS, my weight was pretty much the same, no breathing problems or nausea, and no decrease in peeing. But I am definitely constipated, that along with some typical bloating/swelling has left me pretty uncomfortable later this afternoon.
I found out around 2 our fertilization report. Not more than two seconds after I got off the phone my mom began screaming we needed to get out of the house immediately. They have been doing work outside our condo complex and there was a gas leak. It only lasted about 15 minutes but the timing couldn't haven't been any worse and since then I have been in a really crummy mood that I just can't shake.
I guess the report was good. Of the 19 eggs (I am not sure how many we're mature) 10 have fertilized. Six of those fertilized the conventional way and 4 fertilized with ICSI. Maybe it was her use of the word conventional, or maybe I am just tired of the abuse my body has taken over these past few months, but nothing about this is conventional, it is so unconventional. Maybe it's because my conversations with my husband now revolve around whether or not I am still peeing or figuring out which days he has to take off so he can accompany me to procedures.
I know I should be happy. We have 10 embryos right now, which means we will most likely have at least a few to freeze. But, right now, the magnitude of what we have jus been through is hitting me like a ton of bricks. And I am tired. My body is tired. But, we have embryos, and one of those little embryos might turn out to be out very first baby. So, tonight, when I go to bed, I will hold on to tight to that thought.
10 is a FANTASTIC number! Congratulations. Now rest up for the transfer!!!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss - man alive I guess shit really does happen all at once.
ReplyDelete10 is AMAZING. AMAZING. Take it from the girl that had one - ONE! SO GOOD.
Everything crossed.
Sorry for your loss - that is very rough indeed. But 10 is a great number! I had about the same ratio of retrieved to fertilized (11 of 22). I'm sorry you're still feeling crummy, but it will get better. And don't forget the effect that all these hormones are having on you mentally and emotionally - it is totally normal to feel exhausted and moody and overwhelmed with all that stuff surging through your system. You will get through this, and the transfer, AND the funeral. You are stronger than you know.
ReplyDelete10 is great! Come on little embryos! Keep growing strong! You have been through so much and then an death in the family on top of it. It sucks and it's totally understandable to be so tired physically and emotionally. Take care of you and get yourself ready to receive a beautiful little embryo!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you are dealing with so much at once. I'm sure you are feeling really emotional right now so try to pick your head up. 10 little embryos are growing away. Also, I wouldn't wait for the constipation to pass. I would take something because the progesterone won't help things. IVF is just so romantic!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry about your family friend. I have dealt with a lot of death in my family and with friends, too, and no matter how many people pass it never seems to get easier.
ReplyDeleteEven though it is probably so hard (impossible?) to be excited right now, there are 10 embryos growing and working hard to become your sweet baby and that is beyond wonderful! Remember to care for yourself, L!
Take it easy on yourself tonight. I know all of this has been very draining on you. And in the news of your family's loss, and it's hard not to be tired.
ReplyDeleteBut, you have 10 embryos. And they are growing. This is flipping fantastic! I know it's hard to be excited, so give yourself some time. Sending love
I agree - take it easy. You have been going through so much - can you see the light at the end of the tunnel? 10 is an amazing number!!!
ReplyDelete10 is fantastic! I hope they all grow and divide as they should so that you don't have to go through a fresh cycle again. And remember, once you have the embryo transfer, you are PUPO (Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise) - so go ahead and be excited!
ReplyDelete10 is great! I hope those embies continue to divide and grow! I'm so sorry for the loss of your family friend :( I'm sure that just adds to your exhaustion. Try to rest up and take it easy.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss. Losing friends and family is very hard. I'll be thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteAs far as IF goes...you're in the lovely (read: anxiety inducing) stage of waiting now. 10 is a fantastic number of embryos. I look forward to the next report.
PS - It's really great news that you're not gaining weight! I recommend watermelon for the constipation, lots of it.
What a bittersweet week for you! As if you weren't stressed enough...I'm so sorry to hear about your family friend. Sending strength and calm over the next several days. Hold onto the hope for those 10(!!)embryos. XOXO
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